on the day you turned seven

dear luca,

you are seven years old now.  seven!  it has been a gift to be your mama each and every day of your precious life.  a gift i don't deserve nor fully appreciate.  please be patient with me as i continue to figure out what i am doing.  because seven years is not nearly enough time.  the days have been long - oh so long - but the years are short.  with each birthday, i realize how much i still have to learn.

you were so tired this past saturday, my st. patrick's day baby.  since you were still recovering from a three day fever and still suffering from a yucky head cold, we aimed for a low-key birthday celebration.  there was the breakfast in bed and the opening of gifts, playing with clover and buying lumber for the tree fort.

but there was this beautiful moment earlier in the afternoon.  you asked me to watch you build a lego truck and i was completely drawn in.  your focus and passion were so intense.  i found myself overwhelmed with mama-love.  how is it you have such an effect on me? 

i attempted to decorate the back porch with crepe paper but the wind had other ideas.  you liked it anyway.  our family guests arrived and they are still figuring you out too.  (uncle cameron did not mean to scare you.)

as requested, we ordered your favorite pizza.  i am sorry you could only eat a few bites.  cake was strictly forbidden - you didn't even want to look at it - so we braved the custard cup right before a storm, watching the lightning streak across the sky.  then you announced you were going to bed and told us to finish up the party by ourselves. as long as we would be quiet.

the hard times are hard.  so much harder than we ever expected at this time in your short life.  to be honest, i am just as confused as you are most of the time.  but know this. . . 

i am so incredibly heart-bursting proud to call you my son.

love always and forever,

mama