we're pregnant!!!

we're pregnant. that just seems like such a shock to me still. not that i am having a third child, but that i was able to get pregnant so easily for a second time. honestly, i almost have blocked out how difficult those years before luca's pregnancy were and the incredible toll it took on me emotionally and spiritually. both jesse and i had to undergo surgeries (three between us), i had monthly injections of horrible stuff to trick my body into healing, and at the end of two plus years we used fertility drugs before getting pregnant. second time around was such a blessing (and so unexpected - over the phone, a nurse called to cancel a surgery because, "are you sitting down, annalea? your pre-op blood work showed you are pregnant." what?) but i had such mixed emotions about trying to get pregnant again. would it be a similar to either of those experiences? or would it be something completely new and unknown?

well, this feels like april 2006 all over again. after only one month of trying, we were surprised and excited to see the positive test. i actually took the test on a fluke. i wasn't late and shouldn't have been able to get an accurate reading, but i had an expiring test and was being moody and impulsive. imagine my surprise!! i am 6 weeks along and due june 3rd.

luca is so excited. he talks to the baby all day long. (he put his mouth up to my belly and speaks softly, narrating our day - adorable!) he has also named the baby "harehok." he is utterly serious about this. he tells me regularly that he loves the name and that it sounds really good. he likes looking at the pictures of what babies look like in utero (he labeled one of these photos as "so cute and tiny") and often asks me, "how big is the baby today? like a bean?" gia likes to imitate her brother and kiss my belly. mostly she just says "baby belly" and then runs off to do her own thing.

i already had two appointments so far. my first was a "pre-natal class" that the local hospital/clinic requires. really it means, do paperwork and get a preview of their practice with other expecting moms. i appreciated this time since i am at a new facility and have a new doctor. i have to say i am not thrilled about my new ob/gyn. nothing particular, it is just that i loved my old doctor.

one of the helpful aspects of the "class" was asking the nurse a ton of questions about the midwives rotation that the practice offers. i have considering using a midwife for any future pregnancies, especially knowing i was leaving my old doctor. since both of my labors were so long and intense, the resulting deliveries were fairly difficult. nothing long-term serious nor was surgery needed, but just enough complications that i was interested in trying something different. so i will be seeing the midwives for my appointments (they have 7 on rotation and i will see all during my pregnancy. then i will be assigned one when i go into labor.) the biggest difference is that they will be present throughout my entire labor, rather than coming and going like the doctors. i am hoping this will help ease my way into delivery and that she (or he) will be able to foresee any potential problems. i will still deliver at the hospital.

my second appointment was with a nurse practitioner (it was scheduled before the midwives decision) and was a quick check-up. i think i was spoiled back in normal. i had a ton of sonograms and lots of time with the doctor. here i think i will only get one sonogram at the halfway point. (at which point we will be hoping to find out boy or girl.) jesse had to go on a last minute business trip so i was the mom all by myself with two young kids in the waiting room doing an awesome job keeping them occupied. the three of us celebrated by going to a fave eatery in c-u (empty at 10:30am), buying a few croissants, and watching the rain through the windows.

overall, i feel great. a bit of food and smell aversion (had to leave the grocery store while shopping and sometimes can't open the fridge), but my energy level is up. this is pretty much expected. my fibro begins to ease up as my hormone levels change. hard to explain. i feel pregnant (fatigue, backaches, etc.) but it is so different than usual that i just love being pregnant. amen for that!