hiking sandia crest with cam

back in may, when "little" brother came to stay for 6 weeks, we took a hike on sandia crest.

good thing we had that blanket in the van. short sleeves and unexpected snowfall don't mix well.

can you spot an enzo beast in the wild? he is pouting and wants to be carried. again.

i finally convinced him to follow.

and then he got his way.  uncles are accommodating like that.

green chile stew and beer made that hike worth it.

 
and then there was more of the carrying.

this hike was one year to the day that jesse was laid off back in illinois and our life was turned upside down. we spent the day high above our new land, remembered the dreams of the past and gave thanks for the unexpected blessings of today. we now hold our plans for tomorrow with open hands. He is faithful indeed.

"Because the wilderness will be glad
And the desert will rejoice and bloom
And the ransomed of the Lord will walk upon the road
That found foundations in the wasteland of gloom"
-Waterdeep, Gloom Higherway

i am joining the nester and will be blogging every single day in october! 

full list of posts here.

home(sick) for the holidays

 

amidst the favorite-time-of-year thoughts, my heart is heavy.  i knew it would be hard.  not only are memories of our old life packed away with the christmas decorations, but unmet hopes and plans for a future that will not be.  i know we have been given much.  but i can still grieve for a life not willingly given up.  and that is where my problem lies.  i still see this move as a life not chosen.  i did not ask to be uprooted from people and a place we loved.  my soul still asks why.

but we are here.  and it is silly and unwise to let that question take up too much space.  time and new memories will continue to soften the loneliness.  until then, i need to remember that my home is not anywhere on this earth.  i do not belong here.  i am a stranger in a land that will not satisfy.  so homesickness will be a constant companion.  a reminder that there is something greater to come.   

but we are here.  so i gather pretties and i hock together inspiration.  this is what beauty finding and joy choosing in this not-my-home home looks like today.  pulling together bits and bobs to help me find my creative footing.  this is healing.

and i look to a song for the words that sing for my heart.  this advent poetry is doing the job mightily. 

a weary me rejoices.

a place for all the things i don't deserve

excuse the quiet - or perhaps enjoy it? - while we finish unpacking the final boxes and setting up house.  i am determined to find a place for all the things.  i pared down my craft stash by more than half before leaving illinois, but our rental casita is still much smaller.  our bedroom is doubling as our tv area, tripling as my office, and quadrupling as my studio.  so yes, there have been major donations to goodwill.

i would love to say i have had a good attitude about all of it.  i know it is just stuff.  but i am emotionally clinging to these things, like trying to fill the gaping hole our old life left.  there is soul-work happening and the grip on my heart is loosening day by day.  my prayer is for a clearer focus.  He is all i need.  and no thing or place or person will satisfy.

"what do you think you deserve?  to what do you feel entitled?"
these are the questions i ask myself when the emotions spin out of control.  the answer is nothing - or more accurately - condemnation and death.  let she who is without sin answer that differently.

that usually clears up my ungrateful and moody spirit.

we have so much.  we have Life!  instead of seeing what i don't have anymore, i need to remember all that i have been given without merit.  not because i am a better person than the next.  goodness no.  but my life (and all that is in it) is not mine to hoard.  i am to use it for the glory of Him who freely gives.  He who gave it all.

seriously, friends.

are you with me?

 linking up with gracelaced mondays.

after this storm

our family entered one of life's storms . . . unemployment and job searching and uncertainty.

house selling and saying goodbye and moving cross country.

loneliness and tears and homesickness.

click on over to beautifully rooted to read more.

new mexico bound

it is time for the hart clan to leave the midwest.

jesse accepted a job at the university of new mexico and we will soon call albuquerque home.
it is an excellent opportunity for our family.  i am so thankful this uncertain state of unemployment will only last 10 weeks.

but it is new mexico!
i am still in shock that we will soon be leading a high desert life.

the path is so unfamiliar, but we walk with One who leads the way to joy.

i would be lying if i said this was what i wanted.  although leaving was not my choice, i am wise enough to know that His choices are so much more beautiful.

but there is still the beginning of excitement.  it walks side by side with disappointment.
oh the adventures we will have in the southwest!

 have i mentioned we leave in ten days?!?!?!

i better get back to packing.

(all photos taken from the base of sandia peak during our albuquerque recon trip last month.)

off the market

 

 

i have almost no words.

except that big one written in red.

SOLD.

that one is very clearly embedded in my brain at the moment.

less than 24 hours after listing, while i was still sitting at my parent's dining room table, we got the news.

both a full price offer and a quick closing were more than we expected.

right now i need to shake off the shock.

and maybe a bit of seller's remorse, even if i know this is the right thing,

i am going to miss this place so much.

 thank you, God, for hearing our prayers and knowing our hearts.

on the market

so, we're moving.

it's all official with this lockbox and that listing contract and those insanely clean closets. 

if you're all friendly with me on intagram, maybe you saw my plethora of #housestaging photos. 

(i'm @annaleahart over there.)

it was a looooooooooooong week.

i am actually typing this up at my parents' kitchen table, while we have the first and second showings on the house.

did i mention that it went on the market today?

yep.

i can barely catch my breath.

i can't announce the details of our relocation yet, mostly because those details are still working themselves out.  soon though, okay?

but i can tell you i am easing my way back in to this little blog.

so, see you tomorrow?

xoxo,

annalea

p.s. it may not be obvious in the above words, but i am both incredibly sad and hesitantly excited about all this change.

instasummer

 

hey there.

i've missed you, friends.

here is a peek at our last month via instagram.

(oh yeah. i created an account.  i'm @annaleahart.  now that i have almost constant access to jesse's iphone, i thought i would play with instagram.  it is fun.  don't tell my phone of average intellligence in case it gets jealous.)

also, it seems the girlie has been camera shy?

hmmm.

i think more like she is a busy little gia-bee and not around when i grab the phone from jesse.

jesse has been a mad interviewing machine, but still no job.

some good leads though.

a few road trips to new-to-me cities.

 southern illinois was super beautiful.

fort wayne was way cooler than expected.

the new friends in both cities were amazing.

i want to have another lunch with lauren and dan.

i want to go back to indiana and this time actually see miss jessi.

she connected us with her people and it was incredible.

two neat churches.

next week brings more traveling and more interviewing.

jesse and i are leaving on a jet plane to sunny albuuerque.

and, yes, we get to stay with ruth and co.

i am so excited to hug that lady.

blogging friends have made this journey so much easier.

we have seriously found like minded people near every job opening.

but have you noticed i have not mentioned anything local?

yeah, it is becoming more and more certain that we are not staying in champaign.

we might even have our house on the market in less than a month.

sigh.

we've tried to take time for family fun.

backyard camping and state park hiking.

time in the potager and trips to the library.

basically things that are free, 'cause that's how you roll when you have no income.

it has truly been a rollercoaster of emotions here.

have i mentioned the 5 migraines in 3 weeks?

not fun.

my stress level might just be a little high.

at the end of all this, we will be just fine.

our home is wherever we are together.

our God is with us always and we are offered so many opportunites to cling to Him during this process.

but i can't promise it won't involve a few more panic attacks. . .

xoxo,

annalea